What is happening? I can’t quite figure out what is going on in the world and I don’t like it. There are deaths, uncertainty, lost jobs, funny internet memes, a toilet paper shortage and people putting their bins out while dressed up as Batman…. half the time I don’t know whether to laugh or cry. My facebook feed is full of Covid19 horror stories, with pictures of dead bodies being loaded into refrigerated trucks, but it’s also full of hysterical jokes about Covid19 isolation issues and songs. I’m so conflicted. Laugh, cry, laugh, cry.
Add to my confused state the fact that I can’t see my mum or Grandma and am supposed to stay home and stare at the housework all day and you have a recipe for depression. This is only my second day of staying home since this whole shebang began and already I’m depressed. I thought I’d rally the kids and we’d all chip in and do the housework together by lunchtime. So far I’ve accomplished the making of cheesecake filled Easter Eggs (which resulted in more mess being made) before bailing to my bedroom under the guise of “work”. I didn’t even finish filling up the Easter Eggs with cheesecake. I designated that job to Jazzy, half way through, after losing interest. If you are a recipient of some of my cheesecake filled eggs (which you likely won’t be as Ben is refusing to take us on a little drive to place them on peoples doorstep) fear not about germs. Jasmine HATES cheesecake and has excellent handwashing skills. There was no licking or germ spreading going on during their making.
Working from home is something I’m used to doing but for the last two months, working from home has been an impossibility. I was deemed to be an “essential service” that warranted me getting out of bed, dressed (in non Batman attire) and carrying on each day as normal. The only difference has been that I have upped my germophobia routines. I kind of liked being an essential service. I felt as important as Doctors, nurses, checkout operators and pizza delivery people. Integral figures that are stopping our society from collapsing entirely. But now the essential service I offer Queenslanders has run it’s course and I’m as useless as those shelves in the Coles aisle that used to house toilet paper.
All I’m being asked to do is stay home. Stay home, watch Netflix and catch up on odd jobs. Why is this so damn hard to do? Sounds like a dream come true!! We aren’t supposed to go out unless it’s for an “essential” reason. Food, medical care, exercise etc. What about shopping for Rohan’s birthday presents? Is that essential?? Ben say’s no, it’s not. He is happy just to tack an IOU onto last years birthday present, which coincidentally is also an IOU. For his birthday last year Rohan got tickets to Kiss concert, which was cancelled. Ben promised that they would do something else fun instead and issued an IOU. Rohan has about as much luck cashing in on that IOU as I do of getting Ben to fulfill ANY of the vouchers he gave me for Christmas back in 2008 that involve Ben doing things he doesn’t want to do (i.e. slave for a day).
The general gist of this blog is that I feel depressed about staying home. But also guilty that I’m feeling depressed about staying home because in the grand scheme of things I am very fortunate. Depressed, guilty, laughing hysterically at covid19 memes – I’m all over the shop.
One thing that always helps me focus when I’m feeling a bit lost is a challenge. After arriving back from Europe, and being depressed about how ugly my own garden was in comparisson to those in France and Italy, and I threw myself into Europifying my garden. A massive part of the challenge appeal is that I get to shop for items (which always makes me happy) in order to undertake the challenge. But for this challenge I need to do something that doesn’t involve shopping. Apart from the fact that shopping for a challenge to keep me sane would not be deemed “essential”, Ben has implemented strict ‘austerity measures’ in light of him temporarily being stood down from his job and my contract ending. So whatever challenge I take on needs to be free and able to be undertaken from home.
So I’ve decided my challenge will be two fold. 1. I will blog each day about self isolation, reminicent of Anne in ‘Diary of Anne Frank’. 2. I will try to spend time with the kids each day doing something they like and something I like. Something they like will no doubt be Youtube challenges, board games and me having to partake in backyard sports. Something I like will be reading to them the ‘Diary of Anne Frank’ each night to keep things in perspective.
And…. just because I think humour is the best form of medicine, here are some of my favourite memes: